In life there are times when it seems the Lord deems it right to set His people apart and/or allow them to have a dramatic interruption to all they are doing. This was my experience in the year 2009, just about 2 years after my marriage. I was 32 years old, starting a new life with my husband Claude, starting a new career, planning a family and home and what I felt at that time, disaster struck!
I was diagnosed with breast cancer in May 2nd 2009, when my husband broke the news to me that evening, I broke down and words just could not describe how I felt that day, I was completely devastated. I felt my whole world had come to an end. I kept telling him I am not ready to die!!!! What is going to happen to me now? I cried and cried and kept on crying!! I felt the God that I served, had forsaken me! I felt helpless, heart broken and weak. All sorts of negative thoughts of death came to my mind since cancer always had that negative stigma of death. The fear was overwhelming. All I wanted to do was to speak to my parents and run to them! Eventually, I did just that.
My parents were devastated as well, but they had to be strong for me. They comforted and encouraged me as much as they could. Treatment had to be arranged as soon as possible. My boss and CEO were extremely understanding and supported all the way. I was advised to go to the well recognised Dr Patricia Gomez at Pantai Hospital for surgery and subsequent treatments. I was informed that having children will be risky for me now and it has to be put on hold. That compounded my heart break to a even greater measure and until now I still find it hard to come to terms with it, still seeking God for answers, but I know God has a solution.
As soon as surgery was done, I was referred to Dr John Low another notable oncologist. 6 cycles of strong chemotherapy and 25 rounds of radiotherapy were suggested to increase survival rate. At that point of time, I was so determined to survive that I was willing to go through it all. Although fearing the worst side effects that could possibly occur, I was still determined. My faith was beginning to increase then. I was preparing for battle! And I was surrendering everything to God to take control.
I had 1 week to prepare myself, physically, mentally and spiritually for chemo. I cut my hair short, and soon I had Claude shave it all off. It was heartbreaking to lose my hair, but I did not know where the courage came from to face this enemy. I did not want to see it drop off little by little, but I wanted to stay focus to fight.
However, all the preparation could not fight the first chemo side effects, I was throwing up that first night in the hospital. All the nurses could not help me. It was the worse feeling you could possibly imagine. I felt poison was in my body and I could not control myself from throwing up. I was moarning and groaning and calling the Lord to help me! We prayed and I finally fell asleep. A few days later my body became weaker and weaker as the chemo drugs were killing all my cells. On the 6th day, Claude had to administer a booster so that my bone marrow could reproduce new cells as I was too weak and prone to infections.
Many nights I had very high fever and I remember my sweet husband cooling me down with wet cloth and comforting me in the middle of the nights and praying with me. I kept reminding myself of all God's promises when I was at my weakest like the battle is the Lord's, the Victory is mine!!, By His Stripes, I am healed!, He will never leave me nor forsake me, I memorized and recited Psalm 91 again and again. I kept claiming the finished work of Jesus Christ in my life and claiming that Jesus has nailed my cancer on the cross already!My state of mind and heart changed to be firm in the Lord and believed His promises more and more. I realized that my trust should be completely in Jesus Christ! and not allow doubt to sink in. My faith was renewed.
I went through 5 more cycles of chemo as above that lasted 4 months. In that time, twice I had to be readmitted due to infections, and both times were horrific. Neverthless, I praise God that after the 1st chemo, my tumour markers fell to the normal range!! Radiotherapy was like a walk in the park after chemo. My boss had given me the option to work from home, giving me time to recuperate during all these treatments. I did not lose my income and insurance coverage as means to pay for my treatments. This company and position was truly a blessing at the right time! Praise God!
We were staying with my parents during the treatment and my mother had given her time to cook and care for me. I owe her so much for her unconditional love and care. She had to run back and forth while juggling her tuition classes and taking care of my grandma and myself. I still think she is my superwoman at the age of 64. I love her very much! My family and friends showed tremendous support, encouragment and constantly kept me in prayer. I am very grateful to God for giving me good and true friends and a loving family all over the world lifting me up in prayer.
During this whole ordeal, God was present! He was my source of comfort. Every day the Holy Spirit was ministering to me through the Word and revelations building my faith. I was determined to live! As God extended king Hezekiah's life, likewise He will for me. I will see my children's children. People around me began to change for the good as well because of what happened to me. It's amazing how something that seems bad, God can turn to good. God is great!!!
My last treatment was Nov 8th. IT was a celebration!!!!!! I survived!!! I survived!! The doctor was sooooo pleased with my progress and I was free!!!!!!!!! My life can resume back to normalcy. Praise God!! Hallelujah! God is faithful, He is ever present in times of trouble. He loves us!!!
1 year has gone by and my tumour markers are normal. My last checkup was good! I have my life back and our marriage is way much stronger now than it was before!, We bought and moved in to our own beautiful home, I am back to my office with a better and steady position, We are part of a new church cell group, with a great support, made new friends, and old friendships renewed, I made my first trip to visit my sister and family in the U.S, started a new side business, involved in the Alpha course, & other programmes, making our trip to South Africa, made our first step for baby adoption and submitted our application...Yayyy!!!, Involved in a child adoption support group and Claude has been blessed with the International British School in coaching golf, He has about 26 students solely from the school which has tripled his students and we are planning to buy another car and more blessings to come. God has been good!!!
I believe in complete healing and I continue to claim it in Jesus name! The ultimate blessing that I received from this is a renewed and increased faith in the Lord. A closer and deeper relationship with my Maker and a firm foundation that cannot be shaken easily.
I give ALL Glory, Honour and Praise to my Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ for what He has done on the cross for me and I will testify of His love and goodness now and the days to come as nothing is impossible with the Lord. There is hope and His name is Jesus Christ.
Shalom!
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